tom selleck

#PubicHairProblems by Malia Griggs

From  love+like .

From love+like.

Last week, I wrote a story for Women’s Health magazine called Why I Can’t Figure Out What to Do With My Pubic Hair.

I detailed a mental hang-up I have about my Barbara Bush that stems from a college experience. Postgrad, I’ve gone back and forth about pubic hair patterns, worrying about what men prefer while trying to figure out how to land on a look that makes me happy, too. 

In the process of writing the story, I went on Facebook and posted a vague status requesting guy help for a sex/love article. I thought maybe a handful of dudes would reply, but boy oh boys, was I surprised. I had over 20 guy friends message me, all eager to answer any sort of climax question I might throw their way. They were a little less excited when I started grilling them about how they like their pubes, but I still ended up collecting a list of hilarious, creative and thoughtful responses. And, you know, the hours I spent conversing about lady hair actually helped calm my anxieties about how to properly landscape my Busch Gardens. Most guys said that they prefer "well-kept" or “trimmed” hair, but overall, it didn’t matter that much to them whether girls are completely bare down there.

A big thank you to all the lads who lent me their time and consideration. I wasn’t able to use the quotes in the piece, but what a shame to lose these great, graphic insights. Here are a few of my favorites:

  1. "As long as it doesn’t look like Tom Selleck is hiding in her vagina, I’m fine."
  2. "I’m happy with whatever grooming, as long as I don’t have to constantly pull hairs out of my mouth during oral sex. I would probably be intimidated by lightning bolts, though."
  3. "I prefer her to wax everything because shaving incorrectly can lead to unsightly marks. I wouldn’t want to be doing my business down there and see something comparable to my grandma’s rug or the Rocky Mountains."
  4. "Where I draw the line is if I’m in that region, and I start worrying about werewolf attacks — all getting a lantern out, being like, 'We should get back to the village! The woods are dangerous at night!'"
  5. "I don’t really care if she’s got hair or not, so long as it’s not ’70s porno-style."
  6. "Shaven! It’s easier to navigate a desert than a jungle." **
  7. "My GF and I tried shaving, but it got super itchy and unpleasant. Now, if we’re choking on each other’s hairs, we’ll tell each other to do something about it. Generally, though, we don’t have pubic rainforests growing down there."
  8. "Honestly, less is more. If the hair’s left completely untouched, it doesn’t feel considered, which is somehow less flattering. Like, I spend a lot of attention on making my beard right, because it’s fun — and I like people who take pleasure in details, too."
  9. "As it is her body, she can do whatever she wants. I think if guys as a whole were more relaxed about women’s physical appearances, things would be better. Let your girl be herself. That’s probably what attracted you to her to begin with."
  10. "As long as it’s not the Amazon, I’m okay. That being said, a nice full shave/wax is, ahem, the cherry on top. I won’t complain. It’s like when girls get flowers. It’s like that. 'Oh, for me?!! You’re so thoughtful!'"

**But how fun is a desert, sir?